Post India

Oh ya, wasn't I in India some time ago? I know its been along time. But, since my return I have felt I have left this blog hanging. Closure is needed.

Its been about eight months since my return from the mother land. The entirely profound experience is now just a snapshot within a larger greater plan, that which is my current life on this planet. Yet, still lessons learned present themselves in a split thought or when the opportunity opens up and the lesson needs to be applied. And it remains a journey.

Just to get it straight, here are some hard bulleted lessons learned:

• Always trust your gut feeling.
• Do a whole lot of research before going to an ashram in India.
• Trust in the Divine.
• You are your own guru.
• You need nobody's approval but your own.
• There is no such thing as a waste of time.
• Nothing is neither positive or negative, it is what it is.
• But, its good to keep a positive attitude towards the unknown.
• Trust yourself, trust in the Divine.
• Move on, stop dwelling on old wounds, traumas, and things of the past. THAT is a waste of time.
• Oh ya, and for those of you reading this who are thinking about going to an ashram, do not go to Tureya Ashram, everything you have read on their multiple websites is complete bullshit.

Don't be fooled by the bullets. Something about bullets make it seem so straight forward, simple and easy to get.

Ha!

My time spent in India last winter seems so strange now. Sometimes when I look back I wonder, "was I really in India?" Of course I know I was there on that sub-continent, but given the depth of personal and spiritual work that I was going through, its like India was there to provide the soil. India is the ground in which spirituality can be nurtured and encouraged or perhaps thrust upon you like a tidal wave. It is everywhere around you. Immersing yourself in it is effortless. In a way, I think India is "holding" the rest of the world up spiritually, keeping us grounded on the path of spiritual transformation.

Realization Number 1008

A spiritual aspirant, at any level, should understand that there is no such thing as wasted time.

Integration

Integration. From the root word integral means "to make a whole". Therefore, integration is the act or process of making whole. In a social context, it means the process of fitting into a community.

I am still in the process of integrating; or making a whole. In other words, merging the life that I have created in Boise Idaho up to this point, with a snap-snot experience that took place in a completely foreign land, where impressionable sensory experiences and mental re-programming, of sorts, took place. If you can, imagine putting a balloon the size of India into your pocket. And you have to get this balloon in your pocket, because at this point your life depends on it. Simply deflating it won't do, because all of it's precious air (prana, shakti if you will) that was captured from this foreign place will dissipate and be quickly forgotten. Squeezing it in there is impossible; you can try but the balloon will distort and will bounce back reminding you how big it is. The only logical option is to make a tiny hole in the balloon, and slowly let it deflate as it slips into your pocket, fitting in. That way you can capture some of its essence as it wafts by your nostrils, perhaps dance with it as you walk.

Integration is also a choice. Coming back to my homeland could be a lot easier if I just let go of that big balloon as I boarded the airplane out of Mumbai. Saving me a lot energy formulating the answers to my own questions. But that would be going against the nature of my journey there, against the nature of the balloon that was ready to inflate and expand. So, my choice on this matter was made up well before I left for India.

Talking with a good friend the other day, he said, "when we travel like that, its an obligation to come back and integrate it into life." He's talking about traveling with a purpose, traveling in a self-reflective state of mind (opposed to the sight-seeing, resort-living, Mai Tai-drinking kind of travel). I tend to agree with him. Especially when there are people that you leave back home that are supporting your journey whether it be financially, physically, or energetically. There is an unspoken obligation to bring something back other than souvenirs. However, obligation should not be confused with expectations or the act of meeting someone else expectations. In this case, it is more like an honorable act of giving and sharing knowledge from experience with not only those that spontaneously cross your path, but those who are close to you and support your path.

Needless to say, the balloon is still deflating.
(I think the balloon tried to fit in my head first...a.k.a picked up a gnarly cold upon re-entry).

Where West Meets East

Being in Varkala, a very laid back westernized beachside town, begs the question, "what are we all searching for?" For some it is the Ultimate Truth, some it is relaxation and ease, some are wanderers enjoying an aimless search. I would say that most tourists here are "taking a break" from the challenges of India travel, enjoying less dress, sun and perhaps a beer or two. Some arrived years ago and never left. As for myself, I am taking advantage of this laid back atmosphere to assimilate, reflect and integrate what I have learned at the ashram by practicing on the beach at sunrise and sunset. It's been amazing. There are so many yogis here. In the morning when you view the beach from the cliffs above, you see many silouettes of bodies creating a posture of thier own. It's beautiful.

Sunsets at this beach are some of the best I've experienced. It's not simpy due to the sun disappearing into the sea and reflecting magnificent golden-orange colors on everything in its path. For, a sunset is only a sunset to the observer. Also the actions taking place during sunset enhance the whole experience. With that said, most everyone comes to the beach during sunset. Including yogis, sitar player, sax player, martial artist, hoopers, poi spinner, improv dancers, and many others. All are immersed in thier own creativity and freakiness. Starting to sound familiar, burners? Yes, as the sun disappears into the Arabian Sea bringing darkness here and light on the other side of the planet I half-way expect to hear cheering and horns honking. However, it is quite peaceful here, despite all the 20 to 30 something tourists.

Varkala is not India. So much so that I feel like a stranger when I eat with my hand. Although this place is easy, comfortable, beautiful and a great place to swap stories, I long for Indian culture. I have about a week more in the motherland and hope to make the best of it.

The Head Wobble

It seems there are certain things that are understood that you do and don't do, and its never questioned or talked about because its so naturally woven into everyday existence. I'm talking about simple things. Such as, the head wobble. I was told that it actually means yes. However, based on my observations this is not entirely true. Those of you who are unfamiliar, the head wobble is an intrinsic part of communication in Indian culture. The head is constantly moving about when speaking. I was also told by another, that Indians don't say "no", ever. So the head movement can very well mean "no", but not really.

The best example I can give is this: when I was in the taxi heading to Kodaikanal on my first day in India (fast, crazy driving) and I leaned forward from the back seat asking the driver, "Can you slow down?" He turned his wobbly head back towards me and there it was. No words were spoken, his neck did not move, his eyes did not move, shoulders did not move, just his head bobbing about like it was attached to a loose spring. He did slow down for a few kilometers. So I took this gesture to be a "yes" or an "okay, whatever".

This head wobble never gets old. It continues to intrique me, at the same time entertain me.